F3RVA
Always 70 and Sunny
F3RVA
Always 70 and Sunny

Touch the Tree the Way You Would Touch Your Wife

0

7 wily F3 veterans disposed of the lure of The Fartsack and challenged themselves to meet the new day at the latest edition of The Dogpile. Temperatures remained 70 and sunny. According to the lone runner trotting through the parking lot, the following may have happened:

06:00 – Start with a slow mosey around the Dogpile parking lot, first heading south towards the River, then, accepting feedback from EF Hutton, the Q turned right / west away from the cool breezes likely to be found crossing the bridge. Two more rights had the group on the grass adjacent to our parking area for the COP.

With our Nantan present, YHC felt compelled / encouraged to repeat several disclaimers and informational messages regarding our purpose, the rules / guidelines, and anticipated / encouraged outcomes. Hard to remember the whole thing, so we concluded that, whatever else, there are two exercise principles, which are separate. Push yourself. Make it a challenge for yourself. If you are standing still (literally or figuratively), you are regressing. This group does not regress. It’s you against your ability (rather than you against the next fastest guy). Push yourself. Extend yourself. Yet, don’t feel like breaking your body is the goal. All that said, as brevity has never been YHC’s strong point, some PAX (Handshake, Bodo’s) grew tired / cold / bored, deciding on their own to start SSHs. Gomer grew only more engaged / enraptured. YHC can hold a crowd.

So, with the SSHs in full swing, today’s COP began with…

…anything but SSHs. Let’s do Imperial Walkers, call it 3 of them (4-count). Then, SSHs times 10 (4-count). Then, hillbillies, then SSHs, then, so we could all pay attention to Handshake’s story (which was GREAT and only getting better), we did Dead Man Hang. Walk out the hands into Fuddski, then down to Wilson, then right leg high, then left leg high, then hand release merkins x10. Flip it to WWIIs, some flutter kicks, then some other stuff, and we’re off…

…to touch some trees. What has been promised must be delivered. (Appropriate lack of recall or any foreknowledge of the concept was shown by most PAX. Today’s barriers de excellence were, in no particular order, a) having a prime number of men (7), and b) the concept of having 2 people perform the same exercise simultaneously. Onward. The Q practiced his eyeball rolling.

Rounds 2, 4, 6, 8, 10. YHC forgets, but at some point, we decided to touch trees. This is a delicate exercise, done appropriately, in the words of Handshake, “like you touch your wife.” Also, touching Bodo’s car counts. References to the stiffness of the wood abounded. There was also a surprising bang during the event. No pastor’s or their wives were injured in the incident. We finished with a round of burpees.

Mosey to the closer giant circle. Dora 1-2-3. Team up in 2s (or 3s). One man runs to the light post (yeah, the one that is on). Each man does his own count of 50 “worthless” Gomer-Pyle dry docks. Then, the team of 2 or 3 completes the remaining 200 squats and 300, 4-count SSHs. Griping about SSHs abounded.

While catching its breadth, the PAX did 30 of the littlest baby crunches.

Mosey to the top of the Amphitheater. Not Quite Self Destruction. Start with 18 v-ups and 18 incline merkins…then 17, then 16, and so forth. YHC put a governor on both ends, with the Six skipping a step to close the gap and the Zoomer repeating a step for the same purpose. Push yourself. Make it a challenge. Make it hard.

Mosey back to the VSF, ahem, actual shovel flag. Quick ring of fire, 10 merkins of your choice.

Numbers, names, and Handshake took us out.

Announcements:

YHC is pretty sure there were some announcements. Please add them in the comments.

Grow Ruck coming next year. Apparently, it’s under new management. Might be worth giving it a whirl. And / or, perhaps a locally-grown, environmentally friendly CSAUP with a more cost effective price point. TBD.

NMS: Touch a Tree continues to be a rousing success with nary a hiccup in the process. Smooth like buttuh.

Mumble chatter did not disappoint.

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