21 Men, 42 Guns, and 34 CBOSs

21 stone masons donned 42 pairs of gloves to build themselves and their brothers into better men. Temps were sunny and 70 with a wind chill of 30. A perfect way to start the day started with…

The COP:

SSHs
Imperial walkers
Invisible Jump Rope (forward AND backward!)
Don Quixote’s
Reverse crunches
Littlest of Baby Crunches
Hand release merkins

Mosey to the Far Circle to:

Collect your coupons. Or, as Hardywood calls them, Cinder Blocks of Success (CBOS). Good ole fashioned blocks. Home Depot’s finest.

11’s from the circle to the Carillon fence…decline merkins on one side, reverse crunches on the other. Carry your coupon with you. Or, if you are a miserly fellow, like Swirly and Hardywood, collect coupons and carry more than one.

Hold at the Carillon Fence for:

Touch-a-tree. One man touches 5 trees while carrying his coupon. Partner performs American Hammers, with or without coupon. YHC takes his hat off to those who did the AH’s while holding the coupon. Well done.

Mosey to the Amphitheater for:

Coupon decline merkins. 3 decline merkins on each step. Use the coupon, at your leisure, to make these double-declines.

Round-the-World Relay:

Stick with YHC on this. Four men, two stations. Station 1: orchestra pit. First Man does donkey kicks (has coupon with him). Second Man runs with his own coupon from orchestra pit to circle at top of amphitheater where he meets Third Man (at Station 2) who is doing WWIIs with his own coupon. Fourth Man started at Station 2 and has run with his own coupon to relieve First Man at Station 1. Much easier than it sounds.

Alternatively, YHC points at people and says “You! (points at first guy) Start up there (points to top). Run around with your coupon. You (points at other man)! When he (points at first guy) gets here (points at ground) then You go THAT (points in the other direction) way. Got it?” Clear as mud.

Line Up for Coupon Run, then YHC conducts a total failure of a Jail Break to return coupons to their new home (under wooden amphitheater). Future Qs, feel free to use.

BTTF for 5 MOM:

Hello Dolly (IC)
Flutter kicks (IC, Lawrence Welk-style).

Number-am-a, Name-a-ram-a, YHC took us out. Let’s all find a person to pull across a personal or professional goal line this holiday season. 12 days to Thanksgiving.

Announcements:

Keep Swiper, LugNut, Circle K and others running this weekend in your thoughts. Crush it, boys.

Thanksgiving…TYA has the Q at 45MOM. 0600 start time for 60 minutes. Coffee to follow. BYO pick-up truck with a tail gate.

December 7: Magnum PI Day, bring your best mustache or caterpillar, dress as your favorite Magnum PI character, and practice saying,”Oh, my, God, Magnum” over and over in a British accent. Double points if you show up with a helicopter, black sunglasses, and an over-the-ear head-set (TC!).

Thursday at The Forge…join your F3 brothers striving to win a tussle and a tassel by performing in excess of whatever number of merkins in 45 minutes.

YHC is a man who enjoys both contests and rules. Good contests have predictable rules. With that, YHC posits that HRMs are the only proper test for a merkin contest. The US Army agrees (t-release merkins, as they call ’em). Start with elbows locked in a plank position. Drop until chest is on ground. Slap belly on ground (shout out to the Hoedown crew). Lift palms off ground for one moment. Place palms back on ground. Extend arms until locked. Count one merkin. Repeat. After 45 minutes, you have set YOUR standard. “It’s you against you.” Strive to beat that standard the next time out. Remember the words of Lazarus Lake, founder of the Barkley Marathons, “If you are going to face a challenge, it has to be a real challenge. You can’t accomplish anything without the possibility of failure.”

Day after Thanksgiving, Forest Hill Park Loop-a-ram-a. 0700. Run one lap (or bike one lap). Wait until 0800, then run another lap. Wait until 0900. (Check for text from M asking how things are going). Repeato. Wait until 1000. Repeato. Wait until 1100. Repeato. Wait until 1200. (Check for text from M asking what time you think you’ll be home). Repeato. Wait until 1300. Repeato. Wait until 1400. Repeato. Wait until 1500. (Check for text from M reminding you of family event that you are supposed to be home for). Repeato. Wait until 1600. Repeato. Wait until 1700. Repeato. Wait until 1800. Repeato. (Check for text from M asking why you are not home). Wait until 1900. Repeato. Wait until 2000. Repeato. (Check for text from M asking whether you are ok. Ask F3 friends whether they think your M is asking about your mental or physical condition). Repeato. Wait until 2100. Repeato. (Meet police officer in park. Introduce self using F3 name.) Wait until 2200. (Check for text from M asking why police officer who knows your F3 name has called your home). Repeato. Wait until 2300. Repeato. (Check for text from M suggesting you sleep at TYA’s house. Check with TYA and obtain invitation. Text wife saying you are going to stay at TYA’s. Wonder why your M, who likely has never met TYA, somehow trusts him with your well-being more than she trusts you with your well-being).

NMS:

Not two days ago, Swirly said to YHC that it wasn’t cold days that were hard, but cold and windy days. Sure enough, cold with a side dish of windy. Brrr. Good day for gloves, and that made it a good day for coupons.

As with many of his own Q’s, YHC missed much of the mumble-chatter, however, YHC didn’t miss Handshake’s jazz-hands or whatever those were during the American Hammers. Next time, pick up the coupon.

Welcome to Drew, now “Rasputin” (He was renamed at ETs, and then renamed again). Google it, if you aren’t familiar. YHC will be looking for you next Saturday.