Always 70 and Sunny
Always 70 and Sunny

The Widest Ultimate Field of All Time


An old Polish joke:

After a particularly nerve wracking landing, the pilot of Polish Airlines flight 704 wipes the sweat from his brow and turns to the co-pilot:

-Pilot:  WOW!  Was that not the shortest runway you’ve ever seen?!?

-Co-pilot:  YEAH!  But look how WIDE it is!

14 pax showed up this morning to see what this Ultimate thing was all about.  A few followed directions and brought a light and dark shirt, but most didn’t.  Posh rolled in late to provide black shirt team with a rotation to keep play at the legal ULTIMATE number of 7 on 7!  For Phonics and I, this was deja vu, as I didn’t change a thing from last week’s run from DaVille.  For those of you that didn’t read that, we did a quick loosen up COP, followed by a Lindsay around the field to get in some merkins and situps, and establish teams.  The first to finish is 1, on down to the last, who was 14.  Evens were black shirts, odds were white.  We were a couple shirts shy of having enough whites, so Honeymoon wore pink and Lab Rat went “Girls Gone Wild”.

Before the game got started, however, DK had to do some field maintenance.  I arrived early enough to set the cones along the field, but was horrified to discover that the chalk lines were not visible any longer.  I did my best, but left a little too much room in the width department.  Several volunteers RAN out to help….to which Phonics noted I did not ask him to go.  He was grounds crew last week and was somehow slow to get the job done.  The southside boys were ready to play though, and we had a somewhat regulation field ready to go in no time.

The teams looked pretty evenly matched, but DK’s prowess quickly came to light as he started barking orders to the black team.  It became apparent that he knew what he was doing, as they squashed the white team’s early lead and pushed ahead.  Handshake provided an easy target I guess, as he caught at least 3 TD’s while standing in the endzone all by his lonesome!

White team tried to come up with a strategy of their own, and started playing man on man defense.  Problem is turnovers happen so frequently that man on man quickly goes to pot as soon as somebody drops the disc!  We did our best however, and actually kept the lead from getting too out of hand thanks to some great hustle by Offshore, Rosie, and Honeymoon.

Oyster proved to be very aggressive on the defense for the black team, so much that he had to be warned a couple times that he was in violation of the 1 meter rule.  To my knowledge though, there is no punishment for violating the rules, except maybe you dont get to smoke weed afterwards.  Maybe DK knows the actual rules, but we never bothered to ask.

Play of the day came from Hardywood with a diving catch just shy of the endzone.  I say just shy, but team black called it a TD on the spot.  Fair enough, it was a hell of a grab so we’ll spot him the yard for the glory shot.  I was disapointed by the TD dance routines though….not near enough flair.  That’s probably why we are still amateur status.

The final score would have been 8 to 5 black, but since the Q called out last score wins, Team White wins the game!  Just coincidence that this was my team….

Good times had by all, I think….and no injuries reported!  Well done, thanks for not arguing too much on what a Lindsay is….and most of all, thanks for the excessive mumblechatter during COP!  It makes my heart happy.  By special request, we will do this one more time next week at Heartbreak Ridge!

Apology of the week goes out to any pax of Polish descent.  Lab Rat loves all.

Lab Rat apologizes…


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  1. Announcements:

    -HDHH tomorrow at the new Hardywood Brewing that is far away from Lab Rat’s house.

    -Vinny’s field day at Dogpile. Wear a shirt repping your elementary school days. Also, Ghost Flag!

    -MAYBE anther rundown of Ultimate at Heartbreak Ridge next week. We’ll see.

  2. Great job Lab Rat! I’m look forward to following this Circus to Heartbreak Ridge next week.

    Hardywood had the play of the game with the tipped Frisbee rolling catch.

  3. Good times Lab Rat, thanks for bringing Ultimate to SOJ for us. It wasn’t difficult to convince Cliffhanger to wake up for that one. You would enjoy some of the SOJ COPs where IC now stands for In Conversation, does the count really matter?
    The white team started figuring things out a little at the end but was no match for the DK coached team.

  4. Next Tuesday at HBR will not be nearly as fun as Ultimate Frisbee. To steal a line from your Q today, Vinny apologizes…

  5. Good Q today Labrat. Nice of you and Phonics to make the trek down.

    The fields of no toll are some of the best around, at least when they are somewhat dry.

    It’s was good to catch up with the pax that I haven’t seen in a while.

  6. This is a great point. The Ghost Flag will be up this Saturday at Field Day. If y’all want to play Ultimate next Tuesday, let’s do it! Vinny no longer apologizes. But y’all better get some serious numbers. 🙂

  7. Vinny was kind enough to step aside for next week’s round 3.

    Heartbreak Ridge next Tuesday for more ULTIMATE FUN!

    Game on!

  8. Soooo glad we don’t have to celebrate the Washington DC hockey team next week at Heartbreak! Love ya Vinny and happy for you Caps fans but I can’t in good conscience participate in a rival team’s victory parade. Oh, and I’m sure ultimate will be great next week.