Thursday, February 9
Always 70 and Sunny
Always 70 and Sunny

Oh the People Will Come, Swirly


14 strong (including one PAX from Charleston!) posted right at dawn at our old faithful friend WDog, here’s how it went down:

Mosey to the flower pots on the front of the Carillon for COP

COP: SSH 25x, DQ 20x (Abe Vigoda style), Russian Soldiers 20x, Merkins 10x, LBCs 20x


Luggage Carousel Triple Check: Station 1 (far circle): Sideways declined bear crawls, Station 2 (Ha’penny Stage): WW2SU Pace: Run between stations Repeato 3x, Plank for the six

Quad-Splitter Triple Check: Station 1: Lt Dans, Station 2: Jump Squats, Pace: Lunges from flower pots to Carillon steps, run back, Al Gore for the six

Mosey to the Amphitheater

Escalator: One dip and one incline merkin for every step, adding one rep all the way to the top of the amphitheater.

Mosey back to the flag

Three Minutes of Mary: 20 Rosalitas (OYO) then six inches, 20 LBCs (OYO) then six inches, 20 American hammers (IC)

Numberama, namarama, Singer wanted to take us out.


So the mystery of yesterday’s the vanishing Q signup was solved when YHC arrived at the AO. TYA told this writer that he was the culprit due to some inadvertent Google Sheets shenanigans and a glaring hole in Sheets not keeping much “Undo” history. TYA seemed a little down on himself and his spreadsheet skills. Chin up friend! You’re still YHC’s go-to Big Data guy!

The PAX seemed to be cutting it close but at five minutes to the start, Swirly was getting a little antsy that people were not On Tom Coughlin Time. But just then, the headlights started lining up the road like at the end of Field of Dreams.  Hmm .. Field of Dreams … that’s probably another movie Hardywood hasn’t seen … who by the way bragged before the start that the last movie he saw in the theatre was the brutal Failure to Launch; a hamhanded rom-com starring Matthew McConaughey & Sarah Jessica Parker and Terry Bradshaw for some dumb reason. Raise your hand if you are shocked that Hardywood’s last movie he saw in a theatre involved Wooderson. Alright alright.

We knew it was time to mosey when Circle K arrived, giving him his needed 15 seconds to apply rouge and get his hair did.

The PAX seemed to not enjoy the quad beatdown – especially those who posted yesterday at Toga’s Form Gestapo Spectacular. With cones and paperclipped workout directions (NOW DO 3 PUSHUPS!) being dropped around us like care packages in a war zone by the pay-to-players, YHC moved us over to get some shoulder work in the amphitheater. Flipper suggested that might be the first time we’ve ever done an escalator with so many individual workouts all the way. YHC will take his word for it, because apparently “Big Data sees” that ol’ Flipdog has been upping his game.

At the stroke of 6AM our pay-to-play friends took off like Brightly Bedecked Bats out of Planet Fitness Hell through their Family Circus style backyard shenanigans. Meanwhile, Swirly was finishing his merkins and stewing … maybe even pacing back and forth like a tiger in a cage with so many fitness tourists in the area. As the P2Pers passed by running backwards in the near circle, TYA tried his best to call up from the amphitheater and be helpful in the middle of a set of 16 merkins. TYA kindly informed the P2Pers that they could run faster if they ran forward instead of backwards. Northerners …

Speaking of northerners, during the escalator YHC was able to get Saab on the therapist’s couch about his New Jersey roots. If you see him at an AO anytime soon be sure to ask him about his deep pride and respect for his home state of New Jersey.

Lastly, welcome to our new friend Turtle who is up from Charleston for business and decided to get in a work out with the Richmond PAX. Charleston, you were represented well by Turtle!  Not only did Turtle slay the work out, he refused to take any of the bait that THE Yankee Aggressor was chumming the waters with on Northern-Southern relations during the escalator. Any Brother Of The Gloom who takes an Uber to a strange park at 5:30AM and wanders around in the dark in hopes of finding his F3 brothers at the very least deserved a Q-Uber back to his appointed hotel by YHC. Well done.

Nice work everyone! Y’all killed it out there!!


• Charlottesville starts this weekend.  TYA & Swirly are heading up this weekend so see them if you want to clown car. for more. Heads have been emotionally locked.
• Craig Stadler has backed out of Wilson’s Charity Golf event and there might be an extra spot (or two). Please see if you want to get in 18 for a great charity.
• Congrats to Loose Goose on his new gosling. Get in touch with YHC if you want to take them a meal or see their signup schedule here.
• Honeydo is getting geeked for a Memorial Day Convergence. All the Richard Kimbles you can handle, bro!!
• TYA’s favorite charity event of the year is back! Reese Strong Cornhole & Rock n Roll!
• Virgin Q week is June 26th. If you haven’t Qed before or haven’t Qed a specific AO, get to signing up and expand your Q Eskimo Brothers of the Gloom network!!


About Author


  1. Great BB and beatdown Viral. Having done excessive hills on the Spider Run yesterday (a la Lockjaw), my quads were not lovin’ it.

    Glad to meet a fellow jersey boy…never would have guessed (you can take that as a compliment).

    I am very sad that Hardywood has never seen The Big Lebowski AND his last theater film was “Failure to Launch”…that is no way to go through life my friend…this needs to be rectified.

  2. Great Q Viral. As always the escalator in the amphitheater sneaks up you about step 9 and the suck sets in until the end. Hardywood, I am right there with you, the last movie I saw in the theater was James Bond, Golden Eye (1995).

  3. Swirly (F3 Corporate) on

    Excellent BB Viral – this one will be hard to beat ! Solid beatdown too – loved the dips incline merkin ladder at the end – feeling it baby !!
    Great work today fella’s .
    See y’all in the gloom

  4. Viral, this is a BB for the ages. Let’s first start with the obvious but unmentioned thus far. You are crushing it. This is not a workout you could have done or led a short time ago. TClaps to you brotha.

    As for my cinematic repertoire, I have many excuses though non-justifiable to this pax that maintains a Hollywood Foreign Press like standard of movie watching excellence. I will take the Big Lebowski leap in the near future. I think that’s the movie with the fat guy from Roseanne and a young Lloyd Bridges wearing a kimono.

    It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a movie and it sounds like this one isn’t in the theatres anymore. Can someone tell me where the closest Blockbuster is. Truth be told, I’m totally avoiding that place. I have a late fee on Problem Child 2 that has gone into default. But funny enough I haven’t heard from them in a while.

    Be super.

  5. Hardywood, The Big Lebowski would be perfect for a family movie night. Perhaps Saab could do a themed workout one day.

    Sounds like your movie knowledge rivals Swirly’s knowledge of hockey. Go Ott!

  6. Swirly (F3 Corporate) on

    EF. Ask TYA – My Hockey knowledge has improved a great deal since the half marathon – been watching every night – love me some hockey.

  7. Craig Stadler still plays golf??? Didn’t know he was still alive. Nice backblast! Sounds like a killer workout. Can’t wait to have a Wednesday free this summer to hit up WDog!

  8. Yeah I don’t think I’ll repeat that one again … woof that escalator was brutal.

  9. Thank you.

    Thanks to the entire PAX for cheering me on … it’s been a long trip getting this far and there’s a long way to go but I can’t wait to see where this road leads.

    Also, the collection of your overdue fees has been sold to some plucky little startup called NETFLIX.