Hating Myself & Politically Incorrect

Originally this Saturday tradition unlike any other was to be tag team led by Attila and White Dear.  White Dear had to tap out before it ever started due to an undisclosed ailment.  The PAX had many hypotheses as to what sidelined WD, but none of such are appropriate for publishing.  Relying on a slow watch, a humbled Attila (YHC) came in hot with the group already doing invisible jump ropes.  YHC grabbed the hot potato, and here is how it went down:

• Warm-up
  • 30 SSH
  • 25 DQ
  • 10 merkins
  • 25 Freddy Mercuries
  • 20 crab cakes
  • 25 imperial walkers
• Mosey to the picnic tables to 4 quarters (OYO)
  • 25 dips
  • 25 one leg step-ups with right leg
  • 25 dips
  • 25 one leg step-ups with left leg
• Mosey to the football ball practice field for 11’s with burpees and LBCs – the studs of the group planked while the full PAX completed
• Mosey to the pillars for an Indian crawl through the pillars of pain (NOTE: not the most politically correct title for some, but I did have this name cleared with Daniel Snyder prior to publishing so I should be good)
  • Each member grabs a pillar and the group performs an exercise while the man in the back bear crawls to the front of the group.  The exercise is switched once each man has bear crawled to the front, similar to an Indian run
  • Exercises were dealers choice:
    • Attila – pole smokers
    • Johnsonville – APD
    • Chum Bucket – Carolina Dry Docks (nice and slow with good form, Mrs. Chum would approve)
    • Cheetah – flutter kicks
    • Flip Phone – poll sits
  • Each exercise was performed 2x as we almost made it through the full pillars before retreating back to the parking lot
• Mosey back to the parking lot for a kettlebell flurry to the finish
  • 20 Alabama honeymoons
  • 20 lawn mower pulls – each arm
  • 10 halos – each direction
  • 15 standing rows
  • 10 sit and presses
• COT following by YHC taking us out

Strong performance by the PAX.  Johnsonville was a beast on 11s.  He finished early and got in some work for the plank challenge.  He knew White Deer would be pushing him to keep his butt down on the planks if he had shown, but YHC reminded him that White Deer most certainly had his butt down that morning…in the fart sack (never more aptly named for anyone).

Johnsonville did have a little trash talk for his own 1S (Cheetah is too tall to be considered a 2.0).  However, YHC was late to arrive to the workout than Cheetah today, so he had no room to join in.  Keep bringing it Cheetah and just shame your pops by outperforming him on the Gridiron.  That is always welcomed.  Any successful shaming of Johnsonville will be applauded with an enthusiasm unknown to mankind.

Strong showings from Chum Bucket and Flip Phone.  Flip Phone drove himself, which probably indicates that he was well rested and ready for a strong showing on Saturday.

White Deer was missed.  The air was free of toxins without him, and hopefully the doctor has an ointment, anti-biotic or some other powerful concoction to clear up whatever ails him.  God speed to the bionic War Daddy!

Just a reminder that next Saturday will be a Gridiron F3 that incorporates all of three F’s.  2.0’s and better halves are welcome.  It will be a scavenger hunt workout that will be very family friendly as we celebrate the Easter holiday.  If you have a child attending, please let Earthworm and/or Johnsonville know so we have the right number of post workout treats for the smaller 2.0’s.  If you braved the rain on Christmas Eve, you know that these workouts are awesome!  See you Saturday.

In Him, Attila