Always 70 and Sunny
Always 70 and Sunny

The Birds Poop Here


Fifteen rogue warriors creeped into The Gloom for the latest edition of The Punisher. Temperatures were disturbingly close to 70 and sunny. According to the unexpected Zing Fitter walking through our AO, the following quite possibly happened:

Mosey through the TES walkways to the Third Church outdoor calisthenics lot for the COP:

With 2 FNGs present, a complete, unabridged, autographed disclaimer was provided.

7s – unannounced. 6 SSHs, 1 burpee (groan). 5-2 (louder groans), 4-3, 3-4, 2-5, 1-6.
Ukrainian Soldiers
Reverse crunches
Flutter kicks

Mosey to the Third Church front steps for Touch-a-Pole. Partner up. First partner performs a movement and touches 1 pole. Second partner performs an exercise. Next round, 2 poles. Then, 3 poles. Yes, different poles.

Exercises were bear crawl and WWIIs. 2nd evolution, crab walk and flutter kicks.

Mosey to the Third Church offices. Triple check.

1st Partner: Loop around office. Stop at picnic table. Perform an exercise.
2nd Partner: SSHs
3rd Partner: box cutters

Exercises at the table:
Round 1: 10 derkins
Round 2: 20 dips
Round 3: 30 step ups or squats (note the bird poop)

Scorpion kicks, both verted and inverted, to stretch at the end.

Mosey to the TES parking lot for Hop-Skip-and-a-Jump:

3 Hand release mercans at each arrow in the lot. Dealer’s choice of hop, skip, or jump between arrows.

Mosey to the island for 1 minute of Mary. Flutter kicks and Rosalita’s.

Numbers, names, Splinter took us out with a message.


The Punisher meets this evening at 6:00 p.m. in the parking lot at Bingo Beer for the 1st F. 2nd of is at 6:15. YHC guesses this will be on the patio.


We welcomed to two new FNGs.

Steve Moore lives on Westham (aka – the heart of F3RVA, castle house, 3 kids, son plays ball with Splinter). Clemson grad. We bounced around on a few names…and even after YHC told him we might go with Lancelot. That said, his neighbor and friend, Pucker, came in at the wire with the winning entry. Let’s all welcome, Farquaad (note the double-A). Note: if Farquaad wants to use “Lord” as a title, that’s approved.
Ben Cox – neighbor of Offshore, 3 kids, volleyball player, realtor / architect. Lots of options, but let’s welcome Treanor (or “hyphen” Treanor), pronounced “Trainer.”

FNGs did great today. YHC bets (and hopes) they will both be back.

YHC also notes that someone has exceptional aim throwing wood chips.


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  1. Birds always poop on things that are brand new. No one, not even birds, likes a used toilet.

    Well thought out and execute workout Upchuck. Initial intel from one of the FNGs indicates he may be back, already thinking of how to recruit others.

  2. Thank you for the endorsement, Splinter. When it comes to the first F, I’m a planner.