December 5, 1492 was the day that Christopher Columbus first landed on the island of Hispaniola. In recognition of a man who didn’t know where he was, who he was talking to, or what he’d find upon arrival at his unknown destination, six intrepid explorers ventured into the gloom of the Ridge to pretend we’d found India.
First, traced our route through the parking lot. Tracers included running, reverso, sideways, karaoke. COP: SSH, IW, arm circles, LBC, merkins. Mosey to track.
Groups of 3 for Indian runs. One team clearly the Nina, Pinta, & Santa Maria. The other started as rival explorers Amerigo Vespucci & Co, but somehow morphed before the end into those Three Ships from the Christmas song (YHC has many questions for the moleskin on this). Ships hit stormy weather, and had to add 3 burpees for the 6 of each run line.
Mosey to HBR. In honor of the captain of the Pinta, who must’ve asked at least 22 times, “Are we there yet?” PAX completed double 11’s: 20 merkins, 2 WWIIs; run to the top of the hill, 18 merkins, 4 WWIIs, etc (how did Columbus know about WWII??). SSH @ the top when complete, waving the rest of the ships safely to port.
Mosey to back field, for our brave explorers to scout the terrain. Run 5 yards, plank. Next man jumps over, planks 5 yards out, continue across field. For the return trip, army crawl underneath, careful to avoid stalactites. Midway, switch to over/under alternating, continue to end of field.
Mosey to parking lot for triple checks: copperhead squats, flutter kicks, run across lot. Theme ran out of juice by this point, but the clock hadn’t, so the beatdown continued.
MOLESKIN: I love a good themed beatdown, even one somewhat improvised like this one. Mention of the Christmas Carol, “I Saw Three Ships,” however, has left me puzzled. I’ll leave it to you fine folks to help me make sense of this cryptic song:
“And what was in those ships all three, on Christmas Day in the morning?/Our Savior Christ and His Lady…”
- Is the third ship just empty?
- Do Christ and His Lady travel with body doubles (maybe they were both in all three of the ships)?
- Is “His Lady” his mom, or his girlfriend/wife? I know that’s getting a little Da Vinci Code on us here, but seriously, who refers to your own mom as your Lady?
“And wither sailed those ships all three?/And they sailed into Bethlehem…”
Bethlehem is about 27 miles from the closest body of water, the Dead Sea. How did they sail there? Is this whole thing just a parade float after all?