Always 70 and Sunny
Always 70 and Sunny

Recap of F3RVA’s Third Anniversary Convergence


The 3rd Anniversary Convergence was a double-dip extravaganza to celebrate three years of F3RVA.  Thirty-nine (39) of the faithful gathered in the darkness at 0600 at GridIron, and forty-three (43) of the faithful, plus seven (7) FNGs — fifty (50) in all — gathered at 0700. By my number-cruncing, it added up to 60 different people posting at one or both workouts, with 10 posting early and not late, 21 posting late and not early, and the balance double-dipping.  It was a perfect early autumn morning, and the grass, sand, and pavement were bathed in chilly morning dew, which we promptly began rolling around in (and face-planting into).

0600 RECAP —

ChumBucket took the initial Q on the GridIron with the PAX occupying most of the west half of the football field in almost complete darkness.  Chum gave a brief disclaimer, and led the following warmup sequence: Invisible Jump Ropes x 25, Don Quixotes x 20, LBCs x 30, Carolina Dry Docks x 15, Imperial Walkers x 20, Helicopters x 20, and Arm Circles x 15 (forward and reverse).

Hand-off to Rosie, who ran the centerpiece of the early workout — a terrible-awful Charles Bronson, followed by one leg of a merican beast.

Hand-off to WhiteDeer, who ran wheelbarrows from one sideline to the other, and then back again.  He then ran a boat/canoe series that must have been very effective based on vocal grumble-chatter coming out of the PAX.  Or maybe he ran the boat/canoes first.  All I know is that he was liberal with his constructive (??) criticism of others as to their form.

Brief rapid-fire Mary ad hoc by ChumBucket to permit Johnsonville to retrieve a record-keeping pad from his sporty Camry (no, TYA, that does not constitute “clipboarding’).  Mary series included Hello Dollys x 15, APDs x 15, Box Cutters x 15, and LBCs x 15 with some leg lift holds in between.

Number-a-rama, Name-a-rama, and COT with Wilson taking us out.  I suppose “Hey God, it’s me, Wilson …” is better than “Hey God, it’s me, Sugar Sock …”

0700 RECAP —

Johnsonville took the initial Q briefly in the center of the 50 yard line. The COP stretched from sideline to sideline. He gave a brief disclaimer, and started the fun with 25x SSH, 10x mericans, and 20 hillbillies.

Hand-off to Phonics, who continued the warmup with a machine-gun COP.  I have no recollection what Phonics did, but he claims it was as follows:

10 Lunges IC
10 Don Quixotes IC
10 Helicopters IC
10 Ball Dippers
Plank-O-Rama which included
10 Carolina Dry Docks/Merkins IC
10 Angles Knee Jumps IC
10 Side Elbow Planks Hip Dips
10 Inverted Alabama Prom Dates IC
10 Side Elbow Planks Hip Dips
10 Rotating Elbow Planks IC
10 Foot to Hand Mountain Climbers
10 Carolina Dry Docks/Merkins IC (End of Plank-O-Rama)
20 LBCs IC
20 Freddie Mercuries IC
5 Burpees on your own

Hand-off back to Johnsonville who introduced small group leaders, Offshore, Spit, WeddingSinger, and the HoneyDo/Upchuck team and divided the PAX into respective teams. For the next 45 minutes, the four teams rotated through each of the following for stations:

  • Station 1 (pavilion behind playground ~ Offshore’s team started here) —  Alternate between Dips and Abyss merkins between picnic tables.  PAX rotates around outside of picnic tables doing 5 two-count dips in cadence, then rotating to the next spot. When several men get to a spot in the rotation, they go inside for 5 one-count abyss merkins instead of dips.
  • Station 2 (volleyball court ~ Spit’s team started here) —  Jacob’s Ladder (bear crawling) – Start at one side of the volleyball court, bear crawl to the other side, complete one burpee, bear crawl back to the other side, complete 2 burpee. Rinse and repeat till completing 7 burpee (or the whistle is blown).
  • Station 3 (track area ~ Wedding Singer’s team started here) — 1/4 mile sprints/runs, with no man left behind, meaning everyone goes back to get the six when they complete their lap. 20 count between laps. continue until whistle blows.
  • Station 4 (front of school ~ HoneyDo’s team started here) — Donkey Kicks (ladder or fixed count) — Run around loop.

Regroup in center of GridIron field for brief closing COP with Johnsonville leading Mary consisting of mountain climbers and pickle pounders.

Number-a-rama, Name-a-rama, and COT with Attila taking us out


[FROM JOHNSONVILLE]  It was an incredible honor and privilege to organize this event and to pull together some of our best leaders from around F3RVA to showcase what we do day in and day out.  Each of the leaders contributed their part of these workouts, and I thoroughly enjoyed the opportunity to get a double-dose of gloom.  Thank you all!

Particular thanks goes out to Hardywood for organizing a fantastic catered breakfast from http://eggheadrva.com/.  The food was excellent, and the catering was very convenient.  Please do not forget to consider EggHeadRVA for your breakfast catering needs!!  Also, please do not forget to reimburse Hardywood if you reserved some food.  

Guinea, being rather scholarly despite how he may come across, informed me of the actual definition (not urban dictionary definition, mind you) of “merkin.”  See here if you dare.   At least in my mind, that is not quite in sync with F3 ideals and culture.   As you probably know, the name of the common F3 exercise derives from “American-style Push-up,” or, if you happen to be a Bush or from the South, ” ‘merican-style.”  I suggest we spell and pronounce it Merican.

[FROM UPCHUCK] Nice work this morning fellas and Pinkie. Way to dominate the 4 stations.  Hats off to FNGs Banner and Shrek. Way to push through a tough set of donkey kicks and WWII sit ups. Those are unforgiving.

Gomer Pyle provided his usual energy this morning providing a fine example of how to crawl, get sandy, and do burpees. Well done. YHC Peyton Manning has to give some feedback to Hardywood Brad Paisley on the abyss mericans. Not quite perfect form. Almost there. Close. Basically, almost there.

Luckily, Hardywood redeemed himself by organizing the finest of breakfasts. Yum, yum. Thanks to Nate for doing the cooking. TClaps on that aioli. What a pleasure to lead this fine group. Way to push through hour 2. Great showing in the gloom this morning, gentlemen!

[FROM OFFSHORE]: YHC was continually haunted by “If you can’t Q it, don’t do it” because of being smoked by the preceding leaders’ exercises, the difficulty of the stations, and the ability of the PAX in his group to just crush the exercises. The Q often found himself as the six and Splinter, Mulder, and Phonics routinely led the PAX. Many thanks to Jville for organizing an epic beatdown.

Respectfully, Johnsonville


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  1. OUTSTANDING workouts yesterday, men! They were well organized and led, thanks for all that took part in the planning and running of these. It was a blast.

    RE: the Merkin thing….speaking from the sophmoric side of the spectrum (Saab and I), I also knew the true meaning of the word, but actually think it’s quite funny. There used to be a beer by the same name until the FDA caught on to the meaning and pulled the plug. They now call it “Merlin”. Merkin or Merican, either way, everybody knows what to do.

  2. Great event. Tclaps to all Qs and planning. What a great iron sharpening team we have.

    Welcome FNGs. Great to see Frappachino out.

    Who else is up for a 90 or 120 beatdown more often?

  3. What an epic beating! Great job by all the Q’s and especially to JVille for coordinating. Food was great. Looking forward to the year 4 convergence. 3 hour workout for year 4?

  4. Some PAX may have noticed YHC comments about another line of work 25 years ago.

    Some may have been special in the old stories , but more importantly today, these PAX, now twice their age are doing some of the same things and better. 120 minutes of beatdown? Crushing a 12 hour overnight race? 208 mile BRR ? The list goes on….

    THIS is all the good stuff without the bad stuff.

    THIS is the team all should wish to join.

    Happy 3rd.

    Humbled and Grateful. -GP

  5. What an amazing beatdown and way to celebrate 3 years of F3RVA!! Thanks J-Ville for putting this together. It was also an honor to lead Group 2.

    Can’t wait for the next Convergence!

  6. Epic fun! Sorry I missed the breakfast and the picture. Had to attend my youngests birthday party. Glad to have been able to do the workouts and look forward to the next one. Great to know you men and proud to be part of the team.

  7. Great job putting this together Jville, it was a blast. Happy and thankful to be a part of this group. It was a pleasure to lead during the early morning group, the Bronson is no joke.

  8. Well done jville. It can’t be easy planning for 50+ PAX. Went off without a hitch.

    As for the catering. Sorry I couldn’t stick around to enjoy it with everyone else but I will say my breakfast sandwich didn’t make it home. Very tasty.

    On a final note. Thanks to Jville for doing his best to screw up big data. This one will be fun to fix.

  9. Great leadership on this Jville. And way to expose the PAX to White Deers unique motivational style that we at Circus Maximus are accustomed to.
    Also way to drop the Charles Bronson on us 1st off Rosie.

  10. JvIlle – Well done setting up this fine event! Herding that many cats and keeping us moving is no small feat. Many thanks.

    The catering was awesome accompanied by excellent conversation with a great group of guys.

    Convergence is a reminder that Gridiron is a fine AO with lots to offer. It serves as a great homecoming to celebrate our roots.

  11. Amazingly fun! It’s hard to pick the worst thing we did. The Bronson was awful. Phonics’ short stint was tough as always. Boat Canoes — always hard, especially if you think the Q is going to call you out. Had a great time and enjoyed seeing some new faces and some people I haven’t seen in a long time! Looking forward to the next convergence! See you in the gloom!

  12. Au contraire, I think double entendre is a bedrock principle of the F3 nation!

    Welcome to all the FNGs! Hope to see you back in the gloom soon.

  13. What a way to spend a Saturday morning. I’m not sure how far west we were, but the WV border could not have been much further. TClaps to JVille for taking the lead on making this an awesome event. And anther TClaps to the gents who stood in the gloom for the first time 3 years ago. There’s a ripple effect from you being there on that day. The amount of relationships, experiences and growth that has happened from that day is just incredible.